The Boopis
Why do you need a Boopis? Because sometimes your body requires a .08% blood-happiness level in order to reach the 25% increase in productivity that your boss, Stan, is demanding by EOD.
It doesn’t matter that the seventeenth cup of coffee today spilled all over your Certified Wood Exterior Workstation Desk, resulting in 0% damage to your Certified WEWD (because the Certified WEWD is also waterproof), but resulting in 100% damage to your electric harmonica, which you always keep on hand in case an impromptu rendition of Working 9 to 5 by Dolly Parton is called for in the break room.
It doesn’t matter that it’s already 5:30pm and “EOD” is actually--by some unspoken and strangely enforced regulation--code for 11:30pm. It doesn’t matter that a 25% increase in productivity would mean escalating your WPM to 90.7 (essentially getting the ball rolling), and thereby leveraging a robust solution which would greatly impact the scalable corporate values that your boss, Stan, developed in order to empower and synergize employees with lots of moving parts.
It doesn’t matter that at the end of the day, it’s a no-brainer, it’s apples to apples, it’s par for the course: you just have to do more with less.
Stop throwing your low-hanging fruit under the bus. Drill down, dive deeper, and get more bang for your buck with the Gerpa Goods Boopis: your Intelli-WorkCentre Model #PPOO750E Laser Fax machine equivalent shortcut to a .08% blood-happiness level.
One Boop on the ol’ noggin and your brain will start ticking lickety-split. Clinical trials have estimated an almost .96% increase in blood-happiness levels among select subjects, pending approval by any and all FDA observations, regulations, endorsements, or ratifications of every kind whatsoever. As you probably know by this point in your career, a blood-happiness level exceeding .96% is never recommended, as this could lead to head injury or other tumors.
One Boop and just like that, you’re 25% better in the eyes of your boss, Stan, and that?
That’s all that matters. (Batteries not included.)
Why do you need a Boopis? Because sometimes your body requires a .08% blood-happiness level in order to reach the 25% increase in productivity that your boss, Stan, is demanding by EOD.
It doesn’t matter that the seventeenth cup of coffee today spilled all over your Certified Wood Exterior Workstation Desk, resulting in 0% damage to your Certified WEWD (because the Certified WEWD is also waterproof), but resulting in 100% damage to your electric harmonica, which you always keep on hand in case an impromptu rendition of Working 9 to 5 by Dolly Parton is called for in the break room.
It doesn’t matter that it’s already 5:30pm and “EOD” is actually--by some unspoken and strangely enforced regulation--code for 11:30pm. It doesn’t matter that a 25% increase in productivity would mean escalating your WPM to 90.7 (essentially getting the ball rolling), and thereby leveraging a robust solution which would greatly impact the scalable corporate values that your boss, Stan, developed in order to empower and synergize employees with lots of moving parts.
It doesn’t matter that at the end of the day, it’s a no-brainer, it’s apples to apples, it’s par for the course: you just have to do more with less.
Stop throwing your low-hanging fruit under the bus. Drill down, dive deeper, and get more bang for your buck with the Gerpa Goods Boopis: your Intelli-WorkCentre Model #PPOO750E Laser Fax machine equivalent shortcut to a .08% blood-happiness level.
One Boop on the ol’ noggin and your brain will start ticking lickety-split. Clinical trials have estimated an almost .96% increase in blood-happiness levels among select subjects, pending approval by any and all FDA observations, regulations, endorsements, or ratifications of every kind whatsoever. As you probably know by this point in your career, a blood-happiness level exceeding .96% is never recommended, as this could lead to head injury or other tumors.
One Boop and just like that, you’re 25% better in the eyes of your boss, Stan, and that?
That’s all that matters. (Batteries not included.)
Why do you need a Boopis? Because sometimes your body requires a .08% blood-happiness level in order to reach the 25% increase in productivity that your boss, Stan, is demanding by EOD.
It doesn’t matter that the seventeenth cup of coffee today spilled all over your Certified Wood Exterior Workstation Desk, resulting in 0% damage to your Certified WEWD (because the Certified WEWD is also waterproof), but resulting in 100% damage to your electric harmonica, which you always keep on hand in case an impromptu rendition of Working 9 to 5 by Dolly Parton is called for in the break room.
It doesn’t matter that it’s already 5:30pm and “EOD” is actually--by some unspoken and strangely enforced regulation--code for 11:30pm. It doesn’t matter that a 25% increase in productivity would mean escalating your WPM to 90.7 (essentially getting the ball rolling), and thereby leveraging a robust solution which would greatly impact the scalable corporate values that your boss, Stan, developed in order to empower and synergize employees with lots of moving parts.
It doesn’t matter that at the end of the day, it’s a no-brainer, it’s apples to apples, it’s par for the course: you just have to do more with less.
Stop throwing your low-hanging fruit under the bus. Drill down, dive deeper, and get more bang for your buck with the Gerpa Goods Boopis: your Intelli-WorkCentre Model #PPOO750E Laser Fax machine equivalent shortcut to a .08% blood-happiness level.
One Boop on the ol’ noggin and your brain will start ticking lickety-split. Clinical trials have estimated an almost .96% increase in blood-happiness levels among select subjects, pending approval by any and all FDA observations, regulations, endorsements, or ratifications of every kind whatsoever. As you probably know by this point in your career, a blood-happiness level exceeding .96% is never recommended, as this could lead to head injury or other tumors.
One Boop and just like that, you’re 25% better in the eyes of your boss, Stan, and that?
That’s all that matters. (Batteries not included.)